We just got a 5yo Golden and she’s not housebroken

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Hello. I usually just read and don't post but I'm at a loss and could use some help or suggestions.

Long backstory is not needed so the gist of it is that we bought a 5 year old Golden Retriever from a registered breeder for $1500 with the hopes to use her as an ESA for our son. We got her 3.5 weeks ago.

There are two things making us consider getting rid of her.

The first is this:

This dog (we'll call her Sophie) has a very calm and kind demeanour. She doesn't jump up, bark, pull on the leash, or show aggression. BUT a huge reason why we decided to purchase an adult dog (probably the main reason if I'm being honest) was that I knew I wouldn't have the patience to housebreak a puppy. I'm on Long Term Disability from work so it's not necessarily that I don't have the time, as I am home and my kids are 7 and 8, it's just that with my illness I knew my limitations and having a housebroken dog was essential.

Well… As I'm sure you've guessed, she's not housebroken. I believe that she was kept in an outdoor kennel so I'm wondering if that is why. I have watched hours of videos on how to housebreak a puppy and adult dogs, and followed all of the advice to a T yet she still doesn't get it. We got her a crate for night time because she was pooping in the middle of the night inside. That issue is gone now but she doesn't ask to go out. She doesn't even attempt it. If she has to pee she just squats right where she is and does it. When this happens I say "AH" loudly and bring her outside. Half the time she doesn't end up peeing outside. When she does pee and poo outside I treat her immediately.

The second is this:

We got Sophie to primarily be an ESA for my son, but all she does is follow me around. Like to excess. If I'm on one side of the kitchen and I move to the other side, so will she. I'm constantly tripping over her. The breeder had told me Sophie's mother was used as an ESA and that Sophie had experience with children with Autism and ADHD. She's good with kids but the problem is that she barely acknowledges them because she's too busy being my shadow. It's driving me insane. We didn't buy a dog to keep it in its crate all the time or to follow me around. We got her as a family pet mainly for our kids. I'm starting to think that we should have just gotten a puppy.

I've contacted the breeder as she said we could always bring her back there if we couldn't keep her. She said she can't take her back. So now I'm seriously at a loss. I don't know what to do and the whole situation is making me incredibly anxious. I don't like having a dog who follows me around all day while she ignores everyone else, and with my illness I simply cannot have a dog that isn't housebroken. I feel like she would be better suited to an older couple who really wants to devote a lot of time to her.

What do I do?

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