Those of you who successfully rehomed before. When did you bite the bullet and cut your (and the dog’s) loss?

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Following the recent 'PLEASE DO YOUR RESEARCH' post, I'd like to ask a question with hopefully less shaming. This is another Puppy Blues thread but I'm not necessarily looking for assurance that things will get better (I've read it 100 times in 100 other threads).

Had my pup for a month, he's 17 weeks old and although I don't show him a thing and do my very best every day (I spend all my time and money on top food, care, education, activity, training, Puppy classes, etc.), every day feels like a very bad, cruel dream I'm going to wake up from (I think that's the most important thing in this post). I have a hard time being enthusiastic and not completely removed from the situation and I fight dearly for it.

From my dog's perspective he is very loved and cared for because I don't show a thing, from mine I'm having a pretty tough breakdown internally. I want to punch myself in the face for getting in this situation.

I'm in a place in life (over 30, mentally stable, stable financially, surrounded by people willing to help occasionally) where I should be able to take care of him no problem. I realize now that my apartment is too small for the dog but I can fix this situation.

I do everything by the book from positive education to crate training for personal time, training is going great and I'm seeing fast progress. From the outside I have the perfect puppy. For some reason the prospect even of a well trained, mellow adult dog still feels way overwhelming to me now. I'm not going to ask for forgiveness but trust me when I say I did years of research etc., I was just SO unprepared.

I've read every post in this sub on Puppy Blues, did hours of research on the topic and the consensus is that it will pass. Unfortunately, I don't want to feel like I'm living in a nightmare for a few more years, so I'm thinking that maybe forcing myself through this would be detrimental for everyone involved in this situation.

No need to shame, I've been all over the self guilt and had weeks of sleepless nights because of it. Now I'm not saying I WILL rehome but I guess I'd like to hear something else than 'it WILL be fine, trust me'. If anyone here returned the dog to the breeder or rehomed to a nice family, did you regret it? How did it go? I don't care at all about the money, it would be an expensive lesson in NEVER getting a dog (or anything living for that matter) again.

I'm just at a loss on what to do. Maybe I'm not cut out for it and just too egoistical to take care of another life, and I probably was way over optimistic on how easy this all would fit in my living situation (working from home full time, small apartment, can hardly focus on anything). Although it seems this way, my mind isn't set at all because I do have some great moments with this dog.

For me the best option would be to travel back in time and never meet this dog, but this isn't happening. Remaining choices are tough it out (and maybe gain a friend for life) or cut your loss now (seems very hard to do, would leave a huge scar on me and probably months of hard times but might feel better in the long run). FWIW anytime I think about dropping his cute little face somewhere and leaving for ever after I was his only world for 5 weeks makes me want to cry, but the prospect of taking care of him (even as a mellow adult dog) forever makes me want to throw up. Will this grow on me?

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