Help! Older dog barking might get me kicked out of home.

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I’ve had my dog since she was 2 months old. She’s now 11. She’s always been anxious, but lately it seems worse.

I’m staying with my folks for a while until I get on my feet. We’ve been there over a year now. I have 3 very young kids and can’t afford another place in this area yet. The dog barking is becoming a huge issue. It’s really not that bad, but it is making my dad livid because she only barks at him. He has a strong aversion to any dog barking, so much so that he has a noisemaker on in his room at all times to avoid hearing any neighborhood dogs. And now she’s barking at him. Every time he talks, every time he enters the room or comes home, every time he plays with the kids, a few hesitant barks.

He yells SHUT UP! at her (not something I want to teach my kids) and is always angry with me that I “let” her bark. It’s really come to a head lately, with him screaming at me that I have to get it under control or she won’t be allowed inside the house. That won’t solve it, she’ll bark outside to be let in, and then I’m afraid I’ll get kicked out or he’ll just bring her to the pound behind my back. He’s being completely unreasonable, trash talking to the kids about me. I’m a single mom with a deadbeat ex, trying to do virtual school and start a business during a pandemic, the last thing I need to worry about is more instability.

I know, it sounds like he’s the one who needs training. Regardless, I can’t subject my kids to his tirades and I can’t yet move out. I’ve got to figure out how to get her to stop barking at him. So far I’ve tried telling her no every time (firmly, not yelling), using a vibration collar (which I see today this sub disapproves of), and trying a thunder vest in case it’s an anxiety thing. The collar worked a little, and it seems like the vest has no effect. I had the idea to get him to play with her more and give her treats so she’s happy to see him, but he won’t be open to it unless I talk him into it. What other solutions can I try?

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