Im not a sports fan.
Its not that I detest the past period; I merely never amply subscribed to the fervor.
As a child, I adoration Super Bowl Sunday, but the commotion was at 100 percent because it was the solitary era of its first year that my family dine junk food for dinner.
We even got to eat in the living room.
Guys, that was a big effing bargain to a 10 -year-old.
It was a epoch without the regulation and procedure, and I could fall into a nacho cheese loophole of bliss, while sitting mere inches away from the TV.
Now that Im an adult and can eat garbage in non-kitchen areas whenever I delight, the day has lost a great deal of its magic.
Instead, I now sharpen that vigour on another annual occurrence loaded with equal parts physicality and pomp: Animal Planets “Puppy Bowl.”
Why would I be entertained by hounds is participating in cliques or falling asleep on the sidelines?
Ugh. If you even have to ask that interrogate, become jump out of a bridge.
I crave good-for-nothing to do with you because youre clearly a sociopath.
1. The halftime show is never underwhelming.
Lets face it: Some years, the halftime presentation was not your cup of tea.
Acts like Coldplay and Katie Perry can be divisive, but you know who everyone can rally behind?
Keyboard Cat, who brought the non-existent crowd to its paws in 2014.
2. Dont like puppies? No problem.
I actually dont understand how person or persons can be anti-puppy, but I will try to be respectful of your belief organization( even though I think its bullsh* t ).
Cats are generally present at the “Puppy Bowl” in some capacity.
There is also a rotating menagerie of player support.
In the past, there have been hamsters, penguins and — starting this year — lustrous chickens to fill the important roles of color commentators, statisticians and cheerleaders.
3. Puppy musicians are automatically more likable.
I may be a little biased, but the team members of Team Ruff and Team Fluff seem much more interesting than the Panthers and Broncos.
Sure, they dont have massive philanthropies or stay children in infirmaries, but they will never sadden you by trouncing their brides or is involved in hound crusading rings.
Instead, we have Bryan Adams, the laboratories mingle who applauds from Puerto Rico and adoration Canadian singer-songwriters and Bubba, the Chihuahua special units member who loves banjo music but loathes Forrest Gump jokes.
4. Its unbelievably calming.
There is nothing more hypnotic( or adorable, for that are important) than appreciating a wiener puppy wrestle a bird-dog plaything away from a Yorkipoo.
Truthfully, I could watch that scenario on loop-the-loop. I dare say it would have the same effect as many illicit substances.
While boasting happenings tends to hype person or persons up and get his or her center race, the “Puppy Bowl” is a place of total zen.
5. These are plays additionals you actually care about.
If hours of puppy footage played on loop all of Super Bowl Sunday is sufficient to for you, then dont worry.
The web originals( angels) at Animal Planet have providedyou with tons of extrasyou never knew you needed: fantasize tournaments, in-depth analysis and profiles on the refs.
It is all ridiculous and amazing.
6. You can take the players home with you.
Every puppy featured in the event is from a pet shelter.
This means you could potentially borrows a musician, becoming the proud owned of a D-List celebri-dog.
Thats a reverie is true, and clearly more than I can say for the Super Bowl.( If you tried to take Peyton Manning home to hug and pet, it would likely be frowned upon .)
The “Puppy Bowl” website also gives people tons of adoption aids, so its the best commercial ever to pay an unwanted mutt a home.
Hopefully, I have sold you on the relevant recommendations that if youre not into athletics, dont pretend.
Rally behind something equally American: doggies.
“Puppy Bowl XII” will begin on February 7at 3 pm on Animal Planet.
It will air on curve, so if you want to check in on the big game, you can.
But Im warning you: No topic how hard-handed you search, you wont find a water container cam on the Super Bowl.