4mo mixed breed female is out of control at home, but too scared to leash train or walk when I take her outside the house. I’m going crazy.

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The family wants an indoor dog but we're usually not at home in the day which leaves the dog by herself downstairs when no one is around. She learned by herself that she can go upstairs but not downstairs, so for now I showed her not to go near the stairs. I do my best to train her like going out the backyard to potty, not to jump on anyone which is still a WIP, she learned how to sit on command, having a bedtime and sleeping in her pen. The puppy was super scared at first, but the more comfortable she's becoming, the more destructive she is. I have some issues to address:

She likes to steal our shoes and slippers especially, but other times she just finds whatever she can reach and chews on it. I only catch her in the act when I'm around but most of the time she gets away with it when no one is at home or no one is looking. She is a VERY timid and insecure dog who likes to bark at strangers who walk past the gate in the backyard, but gets scared shitless if the door to the outside world is open. I want to leash train her just a little bit every day so she's familiar with going outside, but when I take her out, she stops for whatever reason and doesn't want to continue onward. When I pick her up, she's completely shaking. However, when I do excite her to continue our walk, she loves a good run so we jog a bit before she stops because of the scary cars passing by or stranger people/dogs that approach and walk past us.

Is it too early to take her out? What's the best way to keep her occupied when we're not around? For now I leave her in the backyard when we're not at home and in her pen in the garage when we're asleep. My goal is for her to be a fully house trained dog but I know I'm missing a lot of steps.

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