So youre between S.O.s at the moment, or perhaps your current rapport is just too casual to endure the couple-y pressure of Valentines Day. Whatever the reason, the point is that youre chilling by yourself on Feb. 14 this year, and certainly that means youll wind up watching Netflix. Not to sound like one of those objectionable single-empowerment essays, but with a liberal be applied in alcohol, a true betch can enjoy herself in literally any place, up to and including expending the dreaded V-Day alone. Honestly, its hard to have a bad night when you only recollect half of it.
But I ramble. Netflix and wine is, of course, one of the most supernatural combinings known to betchkind. Sometimes, though, the infinite variety is a little much, so Ive narrowed it down for you.
Whats more romantic than Channing Tatums soulful attentions and a bunch of men in thongs gyrating to Its Raining Men? Literally good-for-nothing, so celebrate the facts of the case that youre watching this glorious movie with Champagne. Unfortunately, you cant dad a bottle all over Joe Manganiellos abs, so boozing it is the next best event. TBH I should dissolve the schedule right here because I can think of literally no better lane to spend Valentines Day than with booze and, but Ill continue in case thats( inexplicably) not your thought.
2.+ Pinot Noir
is perfect for the fierce betch. Technically, its a love storyin between all the murder and cannibalism, everyones pining for each otherso its thematically suitable for V-Day. Mostly, though, its about Johnny Depp viciously slaughtering everyone in sight and singing about itwhich is exactly what you want to do to all the glad pairs on Valentine’s Day but can’t because it’s illegal/ generally frowned upon. To go with the humaner, pork piesonscreen, booze a Pinot Noir.
3.+ Any 100 -Proof Liquor
Yeah I know it’s not wine, but sometimes wine simply doesn’t cut it. Use some of the strongest alcohol available to male to numb the sting when you realize that youll never have a affection as pure and beautiful as Westley and Buttercups. If it attains you feel better, were all in the same boat.
4.+ Any Wine You Can Find
As a 90 -minute metaphor for STDs, is the ideal movie for representing parties glad theyre not off slamming person with chlamydia. As a fucking terrifying repugnance movie, it requires an entire bottle of wine to handle without “losing ones” brain. Honestly your alternative of wine-coloured doesnt trouble here as long as its got at least a 14 percentage ABV.
5.+ Two Buck Chuck
Riding solo on Valentines Day just means you get at fantasize about whomever you want. You know what that means? Time to break out a series of heartthrobs from your adolescence, beginning with the ever-dreamy Heath Ledger in. In honour of Julia Stiles getting consumed and moving on a table to Biggie Smalls, break out your shittiest wine-coloured, that six parcel of cheap beer, and/ or a handle of watermelon flavored Smirnoffwhatever takes you back to high school.
6.+ Petite Sirah
IDGAF that is supposed to be a Christmas movie. It’s got the word love right there in the deed, ergo it’s a Valentine’s Day movie. Undoubtedly, a movie this sappy requirement something dry to offset it out, like Petit Sirah and your wit.
If you havent already seen the greatest rom com of the 2000 s, Valentines Day is the perfect time to watch it; after all, Bridget Jones herself has spent many a night alone on the couch. Shes too cracked open many a bottle of wine, so meet her in boozing what your mom would call “too much Chardonnay.”
8.+ Your Oldest Wine
has everything: A gold-digging Marilyn Monroe, fucking amazing outfits, and songs devoted to attractive Olympic contestants( I Affection What Im Doing( When Im Doing It For Love )) and how diamonds are better than beings( Diamond Are a Girls Best Friend ). Since the musical came out in 1952, break away the oldest wine-colored in your kitchen, aka the one you bought last week and forgot about up to now. Just don’t assault any at-home colour undertakings, nonetheless strong the push may be.
If you’re not masochistic enough to watch a fright movie by yourself but youre still pissed at being alone on Valentines Day, you can get out that aggression with a horror-comedy like
your love life . There’s a lot of blood onscreen, which they are able to competitor by drinking a dark red wine like Tempranillo.
Normally, I would never forgive watching pretentious indie films because that’s for freaks who went to cinema school and germinate out their armpit fuzz. That tell me anything, is a movie about a prostitute rending through Los Angeles in search of her pimp/ boyfriend who cheated on her when she was in jail. Its likewise mounted during Christmas. Require I add more? No. To go with a movie whose premise is this goody, you need the girliest of all wine-coloureds: ros.
11.+ Wine Cooler
I have tragic word. The 90 s classic, which prepared 90 s girlfriends everywhere believe in the supremacy of ardour with your gradation friend( and more importantly, fashion ), is leaving Netflix on Feb. 28. Since you cant actually be with ultimate DILF Paul Rudd on Valentines Day, the next best occasion is to watch all nighttime. Of route, any movie set at a high school in the 90 s deserves a throwbacktime to break out the wine-colored cools you loved “when youre” 16.
It sounds like something I just made up, but I predict the committee is literally real. Bless Netflix for gifting us with 45 hours of puppies being treasured. Watch in bottom, clutching a bottle of Riesling, then weep yourself to sleep.
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